Preparing to Say Goodbye...

posted Apr 29, 2013, 9:04 PM by Love Like Giants   [ updated Apr 29, 2013, 9:44 PM ]

I have written you an agape "Love Note". The purpose of writing is to increase my understanding of Love and reflect on my experience with it. The end goal is to be a more consistent "doer" of Love in all circumstances and help other people want to do the same. I will write and send a "Love Note" like this to a different person each day for thirty days. "Love Notes" focus on my personal experience with Love; I offer no advice, direction or suggestions. The thoughts I share are mine and I will not be persuaded by anything I know about you. For this reason, "Love Notes" always go to someone I have never met and know nothing about. We are strangers, but I am hopeful that what I write will somehow have meaning to you.

Today marks four days since my Mom passed on. It makes me sad when I think I won't be able to call her on the phone again or FaceTime with her and hear her voice; it was four months since I saw her in person which also makes me long for a mom hug. Then I think about the joy she must be experiencing and how thrilled I can be for her when I think about her happiness. I also can focus on the connection we now have; her being in perfect Love, and me tuning in to it and trying to practice it in every situation I can. It really is a connection that gives me a sense of "spiritual sisterhood" with a heavenly Father more then the maternal relationship, and it's woven together by dwelling on "doing" Love. 

I do not believe I would have handled losing my mom as gracefully had I not been writing Love Notes. Today is day 29 of writing, which also makes me a little teary, as this first project, a project surrounded by so much growth, joy, grieving and change, comes to a close. Certainly, I could continue writing, and I may because it somehow feels like a chapter is not closing by continuing. Still I realize that this first 30-day project had perfect timing to be a better "doer" of Love as my mother and I unknowingly prepared for her transition from this life to another, and it won't be the same as it formally ends. I thank God for keeping me committed to writing a Love Note each day, helping me follow through, encouraging me in sharing some of the notes with my mom over the last few weeks and helping me to remain focused on "doing" Love. I didn't do it perfectly for sure, but my intentions toward "doing" Love have been more deliberate than ever before.

Thank you for reading this "Love Note". This writing has been an important part of my day now for nearly a month, and especially on this day. Reflecting on so many aspects of Love has brought me comfort, clarity and peace; and I sincerely hope it was helpful to you in some way too. Your name was picked at random, but it wasn't by chance.

Getting Better at Agape Love